Archive

Another 5

  • Eating 5 fun courses at one delicious restaurant
  • Driving in Manhattan by myself- and never being lost*
  • Coffee
  • Buying gifts for others
  • Free time

*only for about ten minutes…but I still did it!

Trying Hard to be Positive

I am having good days and bad days.

My good and bad days are closely tied to how bad my dog’s heart is that day.  Sometimes she’s like a puppy who just wants a treat; others, she can barely get up because the coughing is so bad, or she shakes just from sitting still.  Her quality of life is so variable that I just don’t know what to do.

I contacted a local vet about the possibility of in-home euthanasia if Sunny’s heart fails and she’s dying painfully.  I have been pretty matter-of-fact about all of this and the other night I realized why: I can’t start to be sad because if I do, I think the floodgates will open.  I’m leaving a message for the doctor and I feel like I’m saying “yes, I’d like to schedule the killing of my sweet, innocent doggie.”

What do I do?  How do I get OK with this?  I just don’t know.  I feel like I’m doing something awful because she doesn’t understand a thing of what’s happening…like I’m planning a murder.

I just hope she continues to have more good days than bad so we can spend more time together.

Fortunate 5

  • Living next door to my sister
  • Carlton having a friend next door, too
  • Loving my sister’s kids as my own
  • A good friend helping me with Sunny’s rainbow bridge planning
  • Old vines reds

Weight Loss Update

After gaining 75 pounds in 9 months, I had parked some weight-loss updates in my blog.  It’s not a dedicated weight loss blog; however, nutrition and fitness mean more to me now than ever.

I have been wanting to post about weight loss but I’ve been battling the same three pounds for at least eight weeks now.  I’ve learned that one of the indicators of defeat in a weight loss blog is when the blog writer is silent for a while.  But I have not given up and I’m redoubling my efforts.  I promise I’ll post a full update when there is a loss to report.  Before and after photos will be included!

Happy 5

  • The first sip of well-brewed coffee
  • Being incredibly productive at work
  • My little waver
  • My sweet Sunny girl
  • Fruity olive oil

Amazon Subscribe and Save Review

I am pressed for time. Yeah, right, aren’t we all, but I do work outside the home, and I have a young daughter. I’d rather spend time reading her books than strapping her into the car for a long trip to the grocery or mall. I’ve significantly reduced my time at stores by using Amazon’s new Subscribe and Save program.

I first found it while shopping for diapers. I can tell the store how often/how many packages I want and I never have to think of it again. If I’m running low, I can have the delivery sent early; if I have too much, I can delay or skip a shipment. It is intuitively customizable and can be changed at any time. As if that isn’t enough, there is always free shipping AND the item is 15% off of regular price. I’ve never bought a diaper in a brick and mortar store.

After the success with diapers, I added more and more subscriptions for items I use frequently, from detergent that’s hard to find locally to nutritious whole grains for my baby. I currently subscribe to 14 different items.

As for prices, I have (of course) created a spreadsheet to calculate the prices versus the regular grocery store. As you can see, not every price is better. So I make sure that my subscriptions are those that won the cost war.

What about environmental impact? Well, the UPS guy drives past here every day anyway, so I’m actually saving fuel by not driving to the store as often. That detergent I can’t find easily is at a store that’s a 30-minute drive from my house and would consume about a gallon of gas per trip. And about all the packaging? Well, most quantities are by the case, so they are delivered in the manufacturer’s original packaging. I recycle every bit of the cardboard and packing plastics.

Just a few downsides… while the packaging is recycled, there have been occasions when it’s out of hand. Of note was this package. I was pretty excited when I saw the big box: six feet long, three feet tall, and a foot wide. I thought it was a gift from someone. But no, it was the result of my purchase of a cord channeling kit, with dimensions of 3’ long by two inches wide by half an inch thick. This is a ridiculous waste.

Also, I can’t use manufacturer’s coupons. For things like diapers, this can be up to $5. There should be a place to enter the UPC from these coupons.

I absolutely love the program and would recommend it to anyone.

Today’s 5

  • Homebrew
  • Ainsley’s giggle
  • Making an easy dinner for 8
  • Cool storm breezes
  • Potential

Grateful 5

  • My husband surprising me with a petite square of chocolate and half-glass of soymilk as a decadent snack
  • My sister living next door (!)
  • Dill pickles
  • Dinner with friends
  • Having Khyati back at home

The Grateful Journal

Wow, my last post was depressing! As I was puttering around the house and cleaning this weekend, I found a journal that my mother had given me. It’s a blank book with the goal of writing 5 things that made me happy. It’s meant to be daily but I would find myself leaving the journal on a side table for a day, a week, a year (oo! Look! Something shiny!).

It’s so old that it’s fun to review and reflect. I also recall that even if it was a hokey Oprah thing, it still worked. I still could find five things on bad days, and the good days were glowing with happiness. So I’m going to dust off the journal and start again. I know it won’t happen every day, but I’m going to do it when I think of it.

For fun, I’ll post them on my blog, and also an old entry just for kicks.

Today’s Five

A delicious, authentic Indian meal prepared by someone I love

Carlton taking over for diaper changing at five in the morning

Ainsley’s soft little hand on my back

My sister’s sacrifice to move closer to me so our kids can be like siblings

My brother’s unflagging enthusiasm

Archive Five:

Um, yeah, I already can’t find the book. Oops.

Happiness

I can’t explain it.

My job: the one I’ve dreamed of having since college.

My car: a wonderful surprise gift- the car I never thought I’d have.

My house: let’s face it, I’m living in my dream home.

My family: parents, brother, sister: check, check, check.  All are great friends.

My husband: a great dad and wonderful to me.

My daughter: you’re kidding asking this one, right? She is perfect.

My bank account: not empty.

So why the malaise?  Why the inability to move?  I feel guilty even feeling down.  I have it better than 99% of the earth’s population and here I am feeling lonely and depressed.  I just wanted to stay in bed today.  What a waste of time it is to be so sad for no good reason.  Maybe it’s because I’m overly dramatic, or maybe it’s because I’ve been in denial about my dog’s health for quite some time now.

Normally I don’t publish my whiny days on my blog but I do feel that it’s overtaking me.  I have about 30 fun posts to write but my fingers aren’t typing those.

OK.  Back to work.